Chomp chomp chomp
When a woman wears leather clothing,a man’s heart beats quicker, his throat gets dry, he goes weak in the knees and he begins to think irrationally.
Ever wonder why?
Because she smells like a new car.
He didn’t like the casserole
And he didn’t like my cake.
My biscuits were too hard…
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn’t perk the coffee right
He didn’t like the stew,
I didn’t mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and smacked him…
Like his Mother used to do.
A few years ago, the Sierra Club and the US Forest Service were presenting an alternative to Wyoming ranchers for controlling the coyote population.
It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predator, the tree-huggers had a “more humane” solution. What they proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males castrated and let loose again and the population would be controlled. Continue Reading »
When she appeared before the Judge, he asked her, “What did you steal?”
She replied, “A can of peaches Your Honor.” The Judge asked her why she had stolen them and she replied that she was hungry.
The Judge then asked her, “How many peaches were in the can?”
She replied, “Six.”
The Judge then said, “I will give you 6 days in jail.”
Before the judge could actually pronounce the punishment the woman’s husband spoke
up and asked the judge if he could say something.
The Judge said, “What is it?
The husband said, “She also stole a can of peas.”
It has been determined, the most used sexual position for married couples is a doggie position.
The husband sits up and begs.
The wife rolls over and plays dead…